brain fart

I'm beginning to think that I do that too much. Think. I over-analyze everything way too much. I'm always happy and never satisfied at the same time. I am what I like to call an overly emotional person. I'm that person that seems to always be in a good mood. When I enter a bad mood, it lingers like the end of a 2 year relationship. It isn't as bad as it might be seen, but it's still a weird thing to be around. I know what I want, but I'm too scared to go after it. Failure is something that I fear, but more than that, I've been let down way too much. I always seem to get my hopes up and then nothing happens. The anticipation just dies down like the infamous sneaker hype of 2006. Why should I ever tell anyone how I really feel? Either I look too much into something or I overlook a vital piece of the puzzle. I prized things and people that look unattainable and then get bummed out over the expectations that were not met. I have my pessimistic moments where it seems like i am never positive. I really am, I think that this blog is my negative outlet. Where I scream outside underneath my calm and stress-free demeanor. Skateboarding does a lot for me because it helps me express myself and tire the stress out of my body. The blog portion of my expressive self is me actually putting out there how i feel, since tend to keep it all hidden inside. Do i trust women? nope. if you knew me, you would know why. do i trust my family? nope. there isn't anyone to trust. i'm sorry to all four of the people who read this, i don't want to seem like i'm crazy or mentally unstable because i'm fine. things are just weird and will continue to be weird for a while.

i dig you. is it even noticeable?